Now that our album is recorded I've decided to learn to play guitar. Sick of being the Sid Vicious of the band (and unable to continue with the self-harm regime that goes along with that tag) I've started lessons with Nick from the Beggs Music Academy. I selected this school because it was the only place within walking distance and I did not have a car. I now have a car but am locked in after paying for 12 lessons upfront.
I have some gripes to share
1. Nick is approximately 18 years of age.
2. All other students at the Beggs Music Academy are approximately 13 years of age.
3. Nick is a far greater guitar player than I could ever hope to be but each lesson is only 30 minutes and Nick spends most of it showing me how awesome he is.
4. Nick says ''awesome'' a lot. In response to pretty much anything (including many things that are, frankly, not awesome).
5. Nick refers to famous guitarists by their first names. ''This is more of an Eric lick''; ''bend and hammer, just like Chuck'' ; ''you wanna play it like Jimmi but not ''sound'' like Jimmi.''
6. This is not just annoying but also potentially confusing. Last week I thought he was talking about Hendrix when in actual fact he was name-checking Jimmy Page: ''nobody got the chops like Jimmy.''
7. Nick keeps trying to make me play Black Magic Woman. ''Carlos is awesome, man.''
8. One time I arrived early for my lesson, only to find him alone in the room, belting out an impassioned version of Counting Crows' hit Mr Jones. Complete with imperfect vocal impersonations. ''Sha la la la la lal la..... Mmmmmwahhhaw.''
9. One time I arrived for my lesson and Nick didn't show up. He got the time wrong. Instead of apologising the next week he said: ''hey that was some crazy mix-up, ay?''
10. Nick is attending Jazz School and so talks in a mixture of hep-cat slang and New Zealand accent. This is beyond irritating.
11. I don't really feel that Nick and I have bonded and I worry that we never really will.
12. Personal hygiene also something of an issue.
On the positive side...
1. He likes Django, whose gammy handed genius I have previously blogged about.
2. I guess I am getting a bit better.
Labels: Counting Crows, hep-cat slang, Sid Vicious