Missed Opportunity

5 years in a foreign land fair sickened me of certain perennial christmas hits (Slade's Merry Christmas Everybody, The Pogues's Fairydrivvel of New York and Wizzard's I Wish It Could Be Christmas Everyday stand out) that troubled your every waking moment and intruded every snoozing moment in a Stalinist Beckettlike Kafkaesque cliche of torment and turpitude.

These are replaced by one song here...Mariah's All I Want For Christmas Is You...and it is unwelcome (that said no one could argue with the importance of this opus in Mariah's lengthy canon, coming as it does during the death throws of her well documented relationship with that tyrnat Tommy Mottola. We can see in the flirtatious lyrics Mariah's nascent sexuality that would soon blossom into her empowering posture as bikini-clad bitch and ho to any passing R'n'B or hip hop dude perhaps finding its culmination in her pulsating dance/pop crossover Fuck Me Sideways feat Tha Dawg Killa).

But the christmas single used to be an institution to which many bands added their bricks to build. The pinacle for me was Mental As Anything's Apocalypso but does that get played...does it dicky. We missed our chance...maybe next year.



P.S. Special mention goes to Destiny's Child's 8 Days of Christmas which I beleive was lifted from an entire christmas album released post Survivor. A sample of the lyrics below exposes Hinny for the whacky, zany nonsense that my brother so keenly detected. Narcisism, vanity and banal commercialism reduced to two pithy lines...I cannot compete.

On the 8th day of Christmas my baby gave to me a pair of chloe shades & a diamond belly ring